porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
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