Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
