before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I could fuck to npr.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
