I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
