How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Randomize
