i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
