i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Randomize
