Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
