yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
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