i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
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