dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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