so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
you made out with another girl for some wings
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
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