Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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