You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
