So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize
