grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
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