I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Need sex. Gaining weight.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
