how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
