"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
