Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
