Non-Jews are for practice
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
How external is "for external use only"?
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Randomize
