Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
The best revenge is premature balding
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Randomize
