I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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