I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
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