I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
