How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
