i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Randomize
