TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I am one with the molecules
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
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