like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
