You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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