your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
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