Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Randomize
