Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Randomize
