Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
