Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
she peed on how many people?
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I know her cup size but not her name....
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