Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
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