just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
