I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
Randomize
