I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
