your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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