Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
no you cant smoke seaweed
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Randomize
