so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
ttyl tear gas
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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