why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
