i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
im calling her cock vulture from now on
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
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