he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
I see more hoeing in ur future
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