who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Randomize
