HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
