I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
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