let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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