u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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