I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Randomize
