Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Randomize
